WeePlanet

Sweetly: “Honey, why did you title your Shel Silverstein post with a reference to Robert Frost?”
“Huh? Oh @#&(@!”

Positioning my hand on the belly:  “Did you feel that?”
“Coffee’s like his spinach!”
(For all you anti-caffeine-during-pregnancy-nistas, we’re talking about a half cup, no more.  Back off and let my wife get a little pleasure out of life!)

“Baby wants to say good morning.
“Oh, and can you bring me some coffee?”

Stiffly:  “My head is not a scratching post.”
Sheepishly lifting arm away:  “Ooop.”

Dear tony happy birthday
This is a happy birthday
Card. I hope we give
You a present next year
Love ,
maggie

“You know, I’ve got a lot going on right now, pressure at work, being pregnant, worrying about preeclampsia. I really don’t think it’s reasonable for you to add to my stress right now by turning 40.”

“I think he liked The Vagina Monologues.”

“I can’t say anything anymore without you putting it on the web.”

… is knowing what you want.
“Would you mind just standing there and listening to me moan?”

In the morning:
“Uggh. I feel vile.”
…
“It’s sort of fun to say vile.”
Later, coming out of ob/gyn’s office:
“I’m glad he’s checking the thrombostuff.”
“Thrombolytics?
“I’m not sure that’s the right word.”
“Yeah, but it sure is fun to say thrombolytics.”

“Could you make conditions as conducive as possible to my getting up?
You know, prior to my having to do it.”

Him: “How was your meditation class tonight?”
Her: “Pretty good. We were exploring sounds.”
Him: “… Maybe next time you could explore smells.”

“Why do I have Christ in my date book for noon?”
Tony’s coworker Carrie, noticing a less-than-completely-recorded appointment note

“Oh man, I can’t believe I’m late.”
Ana Lisa, rushing out the door to a time-management seminar.