Charitable Donations
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So many of you have been so generous to us throughout this process. For anyone interested in extending your generosity in the form of a charitable gift in the name or the spirit of our son, we have several suggestions. The first is that you do so in any manner and for the benefit of any recipient that feels right to you. Much of the generosity we've experienced in the period during and after Javid's brief life has come to us in ways we couldn't have anticipated, and that has so often brought us unlooked-for joy. The mongrel horde of people who have followed and participated in this website has been a source of richness to us, and we would smile our way through life knowing that you gave toward something that most represents you.
For those looking for ideas, here are four options that we consider to both reflect some of our interests and to also honor Javid's impact on our lives. They vary in focus and, in one case, impact on your tax statement (!), but they're all wonderfully worthy. Much as we may deserve to get spanked for making a corny movie reference, we think this can be one small way to "pay it forward."
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So much of the Niblet's life was spent cradled in the walls of the Pennsylvania Hospital Intensive Care Nursery (ICN), being cared for and loved by its marvelous staff. We can't speak highly enough of the work and the workers. Every child and all parents in an acute health situation deserve people and a place like this. We would be honored if you would consider giving a donation to the ICN.
A friend is still gathering information on how exactly to make a charitable gift to the Pennsy ICN. As we know more we will post it here. For now, please call 215-829-5070 and ask to speak to the nurse manager, who can give you further information.
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When parents hurt their spouses or partners, not just the emotional well-being but the physical health of kids—even newborns—gets affected. In our work lives we are both involved in efforts to get people to stop hurting or being hurt by their intimate partners. Odd as it may sound, we love this work and believe in its importance. We could tell you many stories (when have we not had a story...?) about how changing patterns of domestic abuse transforms the lives of both the adults and the children involved.
We always wished for Javid to see many examples of big people loving little people and each other, and are so grateful that he got so much of that packed into his short life. As our good friends at the Institute for Safe Families remind us, children learn what they live.
The Bilingual Domestic Violence Program (BDVP) of the Lutheran Settlement House, which Ana Lisa directs, performs a mighty labor every day helping abused partners and their children to become safer. The work is immense and the resources are few. Please consider supporting them. This page contains information about donations to Lutheran Settlement House. If you wish to specify that your donation be dedicated to the work of the BDVP, please include a note indicating so with your donation.
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Anyone else ever grossed out but also fascinated when they were a kid by the book How to Eat Fried Worms? Thirty-nine years old and Tony still includes it on his all-time fave list, just for sheer, unabashed worminess.
We've noted often through the months of Wee Boy's life how much his condition seemed to play to the strengths of the U.S. healthcare system. How many machines and treatments has he had access to that are available few other places in the world? How much specialized knowledge, how much expertise? And how we would have loved for him to develop to the point where he could play to its weaknesses! Even when he struggled, we always knew that he was benefiting from the best acute care in the world. It's so easy to be in the middle of it all and just take it for granted, but what an unbelievable thing to be able to say. The best in the world.
Like the title character from My Name is Earl, our grasp of the concept of karma is rudimentary at best. For example, having planted about 50,000 seedlings in one summer of working for a reforesting company, Tony sort of does actually believe he's now entitled to consume paper products without guilt. Twisted but true.
We may never know the total cost of Javid's care, but we believe the figure falls roughly in the range of what accountants refer to as "reedikyoolus." Not as ridiculous as this, but still...
It seems very likely our karmic debt can never be repaid, but the quickest path may be through supporting The Worm Project. Founded by Tony's Uncle Claude, possibly the most equipped person in the history of the universe to weigh in on efficient use of resources and an awfully nice man to boot, The Worm Project is public health in all its glory ... or in the other words, some measure of karmic balance to critical care. Oh-so-inexpensive deworming pills allow the bodies of children around the world to benefit from scarce nutrients. This is a beautiful and worthy project. With very little your impact could be immense. Consider devoting some of your resources to supporting the effort. And while you're looking at the web page, why not spend some time reading and thinking about how the choices we make about what to consume can directly affect what we're able to give.
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